As women become more independent, some men are uncomfortable with a level playing field. It’s a small minority, but these guys are out there.
For many men, the independent woman is the end of the man’s world. While this might sound like an old feminists’ cliché, there’s much truth to this premise.
Resistant to Change
It’s important to recognize these men aren’t plain old chauvinists. They’re just experiencing the natural human resistance to change and relinquishing of a long time tradition of male authority. After all, who copes well with change?
There are men out there who happily embrace the rise in female empowerment, but for the few who refuse to give up control, moving forward with the crowd poses a challenge. So for these guys, manipulation tactics become their tools to maintain a dominant status.
Recognizing the Tactics
For the single, independent woman, it’s important to recognize these guys and their tricks right away. Even the strongest, most intelligent women have feelings which can be preyed upon. That’s why recognizing these moves can help you weed out the men who are open to evolution and the ones who prefer to stay in their caves for a little while longer.
Here are a few common characteristics of the male manipulator:
Once a man starts recognizing he’s not getting to his goal as fast as he would like, he begins the subtle criticisms. Such comments could include, “You seem rather closed” which translates to “You’re not giving in as fast as I would like.”
If this happens, look at the entire scenario. Did he ask you back to his place after dinner and you opted for a coffee shop instead? Chances are, the “closed” comment is his attempt to make you “open” up and give him what he wants.
Some men want women to chase them. This way, when they achieve their desired goal and bail they can always say she initiated it.
So they might send text messages or msn when you’re online, but they won’t call. In some cases, he might email and say he’ll call you soon, but never does. It’s just his way of trying to get you to make the move.
If you still haven’t called him, he might start showing up at places he knows you frequent; in hopes you’ll approach him.
The Control Freak
This is the guy who wants to be in the driver’s seat all the time. He might call you at 7 p.m. on a Sunday night to meet him for coffee in one hour. Or if you suggest meeting on a Saturday night, he will immediately say he’s only free on Friday. This guy will never agree to your suggestions. Instead he’ll want to pick the date, the place and the time. This is just his way of being in full control of the situation.
Don’t Throw in The Towel Too Fast
It’s important to remember that the percentage of men who practice these tactics is small. But if you’re an independent woman and these games sound familiar, chances are the guy you’re seeing is one in the minority who’s not comfortable with your strength.
So you can either move on, or have a talk with him. Or, you can practice strategies of your own to help increase his comfort level. Some of these guys might have potential once they realize you’re not trying to control him and the playing field is even.
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